Folgenschwerer Versprecher: Papst sprach rund 2,5 Millionen Menschen heilig

Bei der Heiligsprechung von Johannes XXIII. und Johannes Paul II. kam es zu einem folgenschweren Verfahrensfehler. Ein Versprecher des Papstes bei der Zeremonie führt dazu, dass alle Menschen mit dem Vornamen „Johannes“ offiziell heilig gesprochen wurden.

Papst Franziskus nach seinem Faux-pas

Papst Franziskus nach seinem Faux-pas

(» english version below)
VATIKAN/ROM (npa) – Im Vatikan herrscht Rätselraten. Vertreter der Kurie und der Apostolische Kammer hatten mit Papst Franziskus seit vergangenen Herbst regelmäßig alle Formeln, Zeremonien sowie den Ritus für das große Ereignis geübt.

Dennoch versprach sich der Heilige Vater bei der feierlichen Heiligsprechung an zwei entscheidenden Passagen der Formel und erhob somit versehentlich alle Katholiken mit dem Vornamen „Johannes“, nach ersten Schätzungen der Kurie weltweit rund 2,5 Millionen Menschen, in die Gemeinschaft der Heiligen.

Nachdem alle am Petersplatz versammelten Gläubigen ad hoc in Begeisterungsstürme ausbrachen, gilt die Bestätigung „per acclamationem seu inspirationem“, also die „Akklamation aufgrund allgemeiner öffentlicher Zustimmung“.

„Formaljuristisch gültig“

„Nach Prüfung durch unsere Rechtsexperten sind formaljuristisch nun leider wirklich sämtliche Katholiken dieses Vornamens (Anm.: Johannes) heilig. Wunder hin oder her. Die Wege des Herrn sind halt unergründlich, Sie wissen schon“, bestätigt Emilione Sangria, der amtierende Präfekt der Kongregation für die Selig- und Heiligsprechungsprozesse im Vatikan.

Der Landwirt Johannes Michelgruber aus St. Corona am Wechsel ist sichtlich stolz auf seinen neuen Status, der ihn obendrein zum Führen des Titels „Hl.“ auf der Visitenkarte berechtigt: „Ich finde das toll. Ich bin zwar seit fast 40 Jahren nicht mehr in irgendeiner Kirche gewesen, aber jetzt schau‘ ich sicher mal wieder dort vorbei. Gut, dass ich damals doch nicht ausgetreten bin, gell? Vielen Dank an Papst Benjamin XIV. oder wie der heißt!“

(Bild: Catholic Church England/flickr.com)

Siehe auch:
» Verbindungsprobleme: Segen „Urbi et Orbi“ in Österreich nicht angekommen (Die Tagespresse, 20. 04. 2014)



English version:

Fatal procedural mistake: Around 2.5 million people have been canonized by the Pope

During the canonization of John XXIII and John Paul II a serious procedural error occured. A slip of the tongue of the Pope at the ceremony results in valid canonization of all people with the first name „John“.

The Vatican’s disconcerted. Representatives of the Curia and the Apostolic Chamber had practiced with Pope Francis since last fall regularly all formulas, ceremonies and the ritual for the big event.

Nevertheless, the Holy Father was wrong at the solemn canonization in two crucial passages of the formula and thus accidentally brought all Catholics with the first name „John“, according to initial estimates by the Curia around 2.5 million people worldwide, in the communion of saints.

Due to the fact that all visitors at St. Peter’s Square ad hoc burst into collective enthusiasm, the confirmation „per akklamationem seu inspirationem“ i.e. the „acclamation due to general public approval“ is valid .

„Completely legally valid“

„After a thorough examination by our legal experts all Catholics first name ‚John‘ are legally valid ‚holy‘. Miracle or not. The ways of the Lord are just unfathomable, you know,“confirms Emilione Sangria, the current Prefect of the Congregation for the Causes of Saints at the Vatican.

The farmer John Michelgruber from St. Corona am Wechsel is clearly proud of his new status, which also entitles him to use the title „Saint“ on the business card: „I think that’s great! I’m not been in any church for almost 40 years, but now I’m sure to go there once more. Good thing I never emerged from the church, right? Thanks to Pope Benjamin XIV or whatever his name is!“

87 Antworten

  1. Ich Johannes, mittels meiner Ämter als Vorstand des Orden OWI – Orden Wahre Illuminaten, durch
    Papst Franziskus heilig gesprochen, erkläre hiermit, dass sämtliche Christen, die daran glauben, das Jesus jungfräulich geboren wurde und auferstanden ist, also inklusive Papst Benedikt, ausgenommen Papst Franziskus, der die Wahrheit auch zu wissen scheint, unter einer religiösen Wahnvorstellung leiden.
    Heil Eris, Heil Diskordia
    Es lebe die 23!

  2. Ein Beweis für meine Theorie, dass Johannes der Evangelist der Heilige war und nicht Jesus!

  3. Hans Knapp sagt:

    Ich war mir schon immer bewusst, dass wir „Hennes`cher“ etwas besondere sind!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

  4. Marco sagt:

    Wer Latein kann ist klar im Vorteil. Der Papst hat in der Heiligsprechungsformel die Namen Johannes 23 und Johannes Paul 2 in das Heiligenregister aufgenommen. Besser sich vorher informieren.

  5. Werghofer Hans D. C. sagt:

    Da ja nur Verstorbene heilig gesprochen werden können bin ich ja schon froh, dass der Gute nicht auch noch meinen Johannes heiligsprechen wollte… 😉

  6. Kla sagt:

    Pfft … 2,5 Millionen. Wenn man alle Varianten von „Ioannes“ zusammenrechnet (was man ja muss, da das ja der offizielle Pabstname ist), kommt man doch sicher auf mehr, oder? John + Johann + Johannes + Jan + Jean + Juan + …

  7. Morus sagt:

    Alle Getauften sind bereits durch die Taufe Heilige. Steht so in der Bibel. Einfach mal nachschauen, wie schon Paulus die Christen aus Jerusalem bezeichnet: 1Kor16.

  8. Lion sagt:

    HAHA ist mein „Johannes“ also doch heilig 😀
    Ich wusste es!!!

  9. Ossi sagt:

    Gustav, wenn du protestierst, dann bist du automatisch ein Protestant, also kein
    Katholik…Pech an deiner Seite..

  10. Gustav sagt:

    Das ist ein schwerer Verstoß gegen das Gleichheitsgebot.
    Als getaufter GUSTAV muß ich dagegen protestieren und fühle mich entehrt.
    (oder war es das Reinheitsgebot?).

  11. Christof Anselmann sagt:

    Im Gegensatz zu einem Interview oder einer Gerichtsverhandlug zählt vor Gott und in der Kirche nicht was jemand versehentlich gesagt hat, sondern wie es hätte werden sollen. Also leider nur 2 Heilige, wie gepant

  12. Hofmann sagt:

    Eine Voraussetzung fehlt Landwirt Johannes Michelgruber aus St. Corona am Wechsel zur Heiligkeit: Er ist noch nicht gestorben! Heiliggesprochen werden nur Menschen, die bereits gestorben sind. Somit stimmt ihre „Milchmädchenrechnung“ nämlich nicht, dass 2.500.000 Menschen mit dem Namen Johannes heiliggesprochen wurden!

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